I missed how you watched me from across the dining table, making sure I ate my food.
I missed how you grabbed my wrist, telling me how thin it was.
I missed how you gave me that reassuring look when you could tell, I wasn't myself.
I missed how you sat beside me when I was 5, filling my sticker-book with new stickers.
I missed how you taught me to hold a pencil/pen the correct way.
I missed how you told me stories of the past.
I missed how you pat my head, telling me I was a good girl.
I missed how you came up to me every Saturday, telling me to help out with the housework.

I missed all these little things.
You might think I don't notice, but I do.
I regret not spending enough time with you, now that you're in such a state.
I hate stifling my tears, so no one could hear.
I hate pretending I'm okay, when clearly, I'm not.

I want to stay by your side, holding your warm hands, hoping you'll understand how much I want you to stay strong, and not give up. Selfish as it may sound, I don't want you to leave, not now, not any time soon.

I love you, Granddad.